4 Things Our Kids Need
To Hear From Us.
1. “I’m proud of you!” There’s nothing more powerful
that an attaboy or an attagirl. In fact, when it comes to building their
self-esteem, saying “I’m proud of you,” is like building a skyscraper in
seconds. You cannot begin to imagine how much these words impact their little
minds. A few days ago, I cupped my eight-year-old’s face in my hands, peered
into his eyes, and told him, “I’m proud of you buddy!” A grin crossed his face
from ear to ear, and his eyes lit up. I was moved but I was also convicted. I
realized in that moment that I needed to make a point to say that to him, and
all of my kids, more often than I do. Our children need to hear this from us.
2. “I love
you!” We don’t
say this enough. And often, we say it flippantly, as if it’s on a checklist. We
need to say this to our children way more than we do. I’m pointing at myself by
the way. “I love you” is one of those statements that needs to be backed up
with action. In fact, it’s critical that we do so. Words can be cheap and used
to the point that their depth is lost. So, let your kids know you love them in
both word and action!
3. “I
believe in you!” Much
like building a skyscraper of self-esteem with “I’m proud of you,” letting our
children know how much we believe in them also builds mountains of
self-confidence. We live in a world that tears our children down everyday, and
makes them believe that they will never succeed at anything. Unfortunately,
they begin to believe this. A father’s belief in his children can change all of
this. You and I become a forcefield of sort, that surrounds and protects our
children as they walk through a cold and broken world. My 12-year-old daughter
likes to perform in musicals. In fact, she has been in six straight shows since
September of 2013. She has a voice that could rival any you see on The Voice.
But she keeps getting passed up for lead roles. It’s defeating. Our hearts
break for her every time the list is posted and she’s in the ensemble. One of
the things that we do routinely is let her know how much we believe in her. We
tell her how talented she is and how we would have chosen her for a role. We’re
not blowing sunshine in her ear. We’re realists and we never sugarcoat
anything. But we let her know how much we believe in her. It makes a world of
difference and has helped her to keep going in-spite of rejection.
4. “I’m in
your corner!” If
believing in your kids had a close cousin, “I’m in your corner” would be it.
Through the ups and downs and defeating moments of life, our children need
someone who’s on their side, even when everyone else walks away. Dads- this is
where you and I come in. Your children and mine need us in their corner,
believe in them, cheering for them, and lifting them up, even when the world
tells them they’re not good enough. A strike out? Stand in their corner. A
college rejection? Stand in their corner. A close friend stabs them in the
back? Stand in their corner. They try something new and unknown? Stand in their
corner. Let them know you are in their corner regardless of the curve balls
life throws at them. ...
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